Dunmurderin'

Onslaught's girl graduated top of her class from West Point. She's getting REALLY tired of having to lose to him in Risk....

Swindle's girl is a Nigerian civil servant who has a buttload of money that she needs him to help her transfer out of the country. Please reply to their email with your banking information.

Vortex's girl...might not be a girl, we're not sure and we're all afraid to ask. Either way, s/he wears more Hot Topic clothing than can really be healthy.

Brawl's girl is tough. She's so tough she gives headbutts.

Blast Off's girl is even more high maintenance than he is and was the first socialite in space.

Bruticus's girl tells him what to do and the big guy likes it! Likes it a lot!

Dun.